It’s Time to Honor the Feminine- On the Inside and Outside

It’s Time to Honor the Feminine- On the Inside and Outside

It is long past time to honor the keepers of the feminine for all they have given us. Mother Earth needs our love and gratitude. Women need our love and honor, indigenous groups deserve our gratitude and respect.

The Western world has gotten caught in a pattern of solely acknowledging and recognizing the worth in what we can see and measure, the things that someone or something are “doing.”

It is far past time to acknowledge the ways in which so many living things have been “being,” and all of the emotional and spiritual resources they have provided us in addition to the physical.

It is time to start thinking beyond just our five senses and remember that the whole of the human experience on earth includes much more than that. The quality of: relationships, beauty, art, culture, love, empathy, care, holding space, positive energy, and integrity we embody and experience from others are core factors in determining the level of satisfaction we experience in our life on earth.

Why are we allowing them to be forgotten, suppressed, and shoved away, when they are such a huge piece of the human experience? No matter what we’ve been taught by an out of balance system that has encouraged “doing” at the expense of “being,” we CAN change the narrative.

We can bring things back to balance right now by committing to honor and respect the feminine in ourselves (whether we’re male, female, or other), as well as in all those who carry the torch for the forgotten side of all that exists.

It is past time to nurture, respect, and show love and gratitude to everything and everyone that enriches our lives through their “being,” as well to honor and recognize how much precious energy they are using.

Honor the earth keepers, space holders, highest good holders, the feminine side of each and every one of us, and the earth we walk upon—for they are not “less than” as our culture has continually made them out to be—but our salvation.

Your Time in the Cocoon is Uncomfortable, but Worth It.

Your Time in the Cocoon is Uncomfortable, but Worth It.

We all want to feel good, and we should strive to feel good—healthy, happy, healed, and thriving. But what happens when we’re not? It’s such an important topic that even the first chapter of my Holding Space book is all about “getting comfortable with being uncomfortable.”

The thing is, growth happens in the stages when we’re uncomfortable. It’s not comfortable for the caterpillar to be stuck in a dark cocoon thinking its life is over, but in that state it is growing— “becoming.”

I’m not saying it’s fun to be uncomfortable, or even that it doesn’t suck, but the struggle to get free from it builds our strength, resolve, hope, and faith—and these are things we desperately need to cultivate in our lives.

Here are a few ideas to help you navigate the darker times:

ALLOW yourself to be uncomfortable first of all, KNOW that it won’t last forever, FEEL the feelings-let them pass in their time, and don’t try too hard to rush the process. The good times are coming, and the uncomfortable times will push you to uncover/heal/notice/do/say/be what is necessary to bring you to the next level. If you need to, say to yourself or whoever may be going through things with you, “This sucks,” or “This sure is uncomfortable, isn’t it?” and let out a bit of the tension by just acknowledging the pain or struggle.

Wish you were already at the next level? Don’t we all. But if you try to rush past it and don’t allow yourself the time to be uncomfortable, the joy won’t get here any faster, and you may miss some things that you’ll have to come back to later.

Most importantly, don’t judge yourself or this time. It is normal. It is necessary. And it sucks. But YOU don’t suck. If you can give yourself grace, love yourself, and be willing to look into the gifts in the darkness, you will grow into that next version of yourself. You will not get sucked into the void if you learn not to fear it.

It’s been super intense out there lately, friends.

Allow whatever it is, be kind to yourself, and remember that nothing will change on the outer level until you’re willing to look at it on the inner level. The uncomfortable times force us to SEE—if we are willing to look.

(This post is something I wrote on Facebook years ago. I re-shared it recently and it got great feedback, so I wanted to share it over here).

But What About Our Arms?

But What About Our Arms?

As I was doing my meditation and body healing this morning, moving the clearing energy down my body, it got stuck right above my arms and did not want to move down them.

So I did some investigating. I had a conversation in my head with my arms and found out why there was an energy blockage there. Turns out- they feel forgotten about with all of the healing work I’ve been doing for myself. And guess what- they are absolutely right!

I’ve been doing a chakra healing program lately and when I was investigating why my arms felt left out, I realized that they were! If you’ve studied energy for even a little while, you most likely know that there are more than just the main seven chakras in our energy centers. However, it seems most general healing practices, while keeping their focus on the main seven, are leaving out the arms. It seems that almost all of the attention is given to the chakras along the central channel of our bodies, and then to our legs, as much attention is given to grounding to the earth and breathing down through our legs and feet. My arms felt as if they were an afterthought, an “extra” hanging out outside of the rest of the central trunk of the body.

As I thought about it, there really hasn’t been an energy healing program I’ve done that focused on, or even really talked about the arms. The arms do so much for us. They do the “heavy lifting” of our lives, they help us eat, reach, climb, hug, and create. Why is it, I wonder, that most of the general energy healing programs forget about them? My arms felt like they didn’t get any of the healing that the rest of my body was getting, and they were absolutely right. I felt bad that I had glossed over them so badly when they were every bit as important and worthy as the rest of my body.

I hadn’t done it on purpose, I was just following the healing programs as they were taught to me all throughout my life. And the healings have been incredible. So many things have been released, shifted, and strengthened through all of the different healing modalities and practitioners I have tried, but my arms were absolutely right, they had gotten the shaft for far too long.

So my question to the universe, and the healing community at large, is “What about our arms?” I promised my arms that I would write this blog to further investigate the dismissal of their worthiness in overall healing protocols, and even just the recognition that they are an important part of our body. They really felt slighted, and they had every reason to feel so.

So what gives? Can this be changed? Can we look at adding in some attention and healing to our arms in the general energetic center healing practices? They do so much for us.

It’s time to start focusing on and recognizing all of the things, people, and concepts that have been left behind for far too long. To integrate our wholeness, we must investigate, recognize, and love all of the things, people, and concepts that have been shunned or pushed to the wayside.

Energy

Energy

What if all of the turbulent weather we’ve been experiencing is a reflection of our collective turbulent thoughts and feelings?

Does that seem crazy?

If so, I ask you to kindly consider the reverse…

Everyone agrees that the moon affects the tides and our bodies are mostly water… therefore, the phases of the moon also affect us.

My point? EVERYTHING is connected, and EVERYTHING is made up of energy that can be manipulated in some way either by the thing itself, or by someone or something else.

I caught a portion of a Zoom yesterday with a quantum physicist and in the comments, someone mentioned the idea that perhaps the wild weather we’ve been getting is really just a reflection of our unsettled collective energy.

There is so much being purged in the human race, the earth, and everything on it at this time, that I can definitely see that being a possibility.

Today I took it even further and considered this…I have numerous afflictions from years of chronic stress (even being an avid meditator and personal growth guru – there has been a lot going on for me personally the last few years, and many different types of stress have been present- even energetic stress from certain environments).

Everyone knows that stress can turn into malfunctions in the body system. But have we considered that it’s energy that makes this so (remember qi and mana)?

If personal stress (an imbalance in our personal energy) can cause disruption in our individual body systems, doesn’t it make sense that collective stress can manifest in turbulent weather patterns (which are also fueled by energy)?

I’m not blaming or shaming anyone here, but rather want to continue to bring awareness to why I advocate that it is our duty as humans “be-ing,” to be responsible with our energy. Just because we don’t understand it or weren’t taught that it matters, doesn’t make it any less true that our energy affects not only us, but everyone and everything around us.

– Musings from my forthcoming book in progress about the importance of understanding and being aware of energy. *Full Disclaimer and heads up to budding personal growth authors- being a non-fiction personal growth author can be a slippery thing. You start going through a bunch of things personally, and all of a sudden, you’re guided to write a book on what you were only just beginning to piece together from different periods of your life. After that, get ready for the ride because you will end up going through a whole lot more to make sure you really understand what you didn’t even realize you were going to be writing/teaching about. The universe just wants to make sure you are fully embodied in the subject! :O

Obstacles

Obstacles

What is the purpose of an obstacle when it appears in our life?

When we are trying to level-up, push through to a new way of being, or heal, obstacles seem to come around right when we start thinking to ourselves, “I got this,” triggering our spiral into a land of confusion that could very possibly push us way off course if we give in.

So why do they come around, and what attention (if any) do we need to give them?

Here’s the thing… whatever we still need to heal from will very often make itself known when we are trying to move forward to our next step in life. No matter how big the leap, or how different the change, we can almost expect obstacles to show up just when we think we’re ready to go. When this happens, chances are we are ready to go on many levels, but if we push forward without addressing the old triggers or hurts that are lurking in our shadows, our ride will most likely not be a smooth one.

We have a choice in these moments, we can look at the obstacles/triggers/wounds and see what they are showing us, we can press on and try our best to ignore them, or we can give up and throw in the towel. If we try to ignore them or throw in the towel, it’s very possible that we will come face to face with a similar situation in the future. The presence of an obstacle does not necessarily mean that we are on the wrong path. In fact, it could very well point to the knowing that we are absolutely on the right path, as long as we remember that growing and learning through processing blocks is part of the fabric of life.

Of course there are times when we may not be entirely ready to work with our blocks and obstacles and keep moving in the direction that we were headed in. That’s okay. If the path we were following is the right one, our opportunities will show up again another time with different details. We can only run from things for so long until we have to face them and grow through the pain or discomfort. But we also have to do it at a pace that we can handle. If it’s not time, it’s not time. But if the time is ripe and we think we may not have the strength, it’s a great time for us to go deep into journaling, meditation, stillness, prayer, and all other forms of personal reflection and communion with that which is greater than us to help us navigate our way through.

Above all, we must remember that the path is not linear. We may have begun with a grand idea of what things would look like as we gracefully danced from point A to point B, but it rarely ever looks that way. The path is curvy, filled with spikes and dips, and we would do best to remember that any time the going gets a little rough.

Godspeed all.

You got this.

Listening to Your Body

Listening to Your Body

I’ve recently started a new (well, re-newed) practice during my morning meditation where I get myself into a deep meditative state and then perform a body scan. Starting with my toes and moving my way up my body, I energetically view each organ/body part to see how it’s doing. If everything looks clear and great, I move on. If not, I ask that part of me what I can do to best support it.

Using this technique, I have been lead to supplements, foods, and specific types of massage techniques to do, as well as healing exercises that I perform during the scan.

My body has taken a bit of a heavy toll in the last few years and some health issues have resulted. Though I eat healthy, meditate and exercise routinely, sometimes things pile up and our bodies take on a heavier load than we can digest and eliminate healthfully (both literally and metaphorically).

I was guided to write today but wasn’t sure what about. This is what came to me. Perhaps the body scan technique will help you unlock answers from your divine body wisdom to assist you in lightening your load as well.

Wishing you all things balanced and healthy.

Using Intuition to Make Choices

Using Intuition to Make Choices

Unsure of what to do in uncertain times?

Perhaps you’ve spent your whole life following culture’s directions by the letter, thinking you were doing everything right, only to have it all vanish in a puff of smoke like some kind of strange magic trick.

Why aren’t the skills you were taught working anymore?  What do you do and who do you turn to when the culture that told you what you needed to get ahead no longer has any sense of direction itself?

Good times always come after bad times, and there’s always a gift to be found.  So if you weren’t one to give much attention or credibility to your own connection to that which is greater than you in the past, think of the present time as your golden opportunity to learn how to tune in!

So how do you tune in to your intuition?  It’s an abstract concept, so it’s not as easily grasped as the things we learn in academia that can be quantified or touched with our five senses.

Let’s look at love and gut feelings for a moment.  Don’t we all have those, even when they seem ridiculous, and the “facts” are clearly pointing in another direction?  But still, those feelings persist, and seem to know as much of what they are talking about as our heads and our “facts.”

I have been living by my higher guidance an intuition for many, many years now.  It all happened when I realized that I was trying to spin all the plates of my life in the air like a circus clown, and finally realized that I was not the one in control here, and I certainly had no idea of the bigger picture at hand.

And that’s when I learned to go within.  To surrender.  To put my higher power in charge of my direction, while I worked with it/them/my intuition as a partner.

I have often been asked over the years why I would give over my free will of all of life’s decisions to my higher power, and not have any control over my life.  The truth is that it’s quite the opposite.  Not only am I using my free will to make the choice to put my higher power/intuition/spiritual team in charge, but I am also not a silent partner.

Though I tune in and ask for direction on many things all day long, if something seems off to me or it can’t be done in the physical world the way I am being guided, I definitely will jump in and mention it.  It’s like having my higher power/intuition be the captain of my ship, but I am the first mate- and if by chance the captain misses a possible danger or obstacle- it is my responsibility to point it out and then work from there.

Since I have been living by intuition/divine guidance, I can’t even begin to count the  times in my life I have been amazed by how things came together to orchestrate an answer, healing, or solution to an issue- almost always in a way that far exceeded anything I thought I wanted it to look like.

I got off track a bit, and want to circle back around- so back to helping you with the “how” of learning to work with your intuition/higher power…

It is a bit like tuning a radio dial- the frequency is sometimes tough to get clearly, as there is lots of debris in the ethers at any given time, and plenty of other debris in our earthly minds and vessels that we have picked up over the years that may hamper our clarity when trying to “check in.”  There is also the matter of whether the guidance we are receiving (or think we are receiving) is from ego or something higher, benevolent or malevolent.

As you work with yourself and your guidance, you will find that your methods to fine tuning your connection will change over time, sometimes go out completely, and sometimes be muddled by other things.  Like anything, the more you practice, the better you will become.

Here’s a few quick-start tips:

Begin with meditation.  If you haven’t meditated before, I suggest starting with guided meditations (you can find many on youtube and otherwise) as they give your mind something to do.  When you are finished, try journaling.  Try having a conversation on paper or the computer with your higher power/intuition.  Ask your mind to take a backseat as you keep your consciousness open in order to receive.  Ask questions and then let your pen or fingers on the keys be free to write or type what is coming through, without you trying to control it, even if the answers seem counterintuitive to what your mind may think.

Keep it in the highest vibe.  In the beginning, it is best to ask whatever force you are talking to if it is benevolent, as there are trickster spirits that do love when people begin to open up to their connections again.  If you ask three times and get a yes, you are most likely talking to a benevolent being/your higher self.  Trickster spirits and lower energy beings can’t answer this question three times confidently.

Experiment.  Start with little decisions.  Use the meditation/journaling/asking process for small decisions and questions at first, and see how it works for you.  *Note* If you are in need of major decisions that cannot be answered in the way you are used to living, feel free to center yourself as much as possible and ask for help with those as well.  Better late than never.

It’s a process.  Though you may not have been taught how to honor and use your intuition/higher power to help guide you on a personal basis in your life previously, know that you can begin now.  The divine masculine and divine feminine (in this case intuition/spirit as a feminine energy and  action steps/decisions as a masculine energy) have always needed to work together to achieve the highest harmony and balance for all- it’s time to reclaim your divine birthright and inner GPS for life.

If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me or peruse my books, blog, website, facebook page, or youtube channel for further information and guidance. I hope this blog has given you hope for beginning to find answers to life’s hardest questions, and new direction in a world that has proven that honoring only one side of the picture may not bring you the answers you truly seek.

https://www.amazon.com/Amanda-Dobra-Hope/e/B01M3Z0UD0/ref=dp_byline_cont_ebooks_1

http://www.itsasyoulikeit.com

http://www.facebook.com/itsasyoulikeit

 

Be well!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Conditioned Response

Conditioned Response

I started dusting a little while ago because I suddenly felt guided to.

As I began moving the decorations on the entertainment center in the living room to dust, one of my cats came bolting out of her favorite adjacent room and ran upstairs.

Why?

Conditioned Response.

She’s not afraid of my dusting. What she is afraid of is the vacuum. Historically, when I dust, the vacuum is soon to follow.

Now I’ve been low on energy for quite a while, and was only planning on dusting as that’s all I had the energy for today. I wasn’t going to vacuum. But, this creature whom I can’t communicate with in words to tell her that, has learned about the environments she lives in and how to predict them by observing them. Humans have words, but we don’t always think to use them to convey to people that we aren’t going to cause them the same harm that someone or something in their past did. And even if we did use them, it may not do any good as people often get triggered.

Familiar things start happening, a person’s conditioned response sets in, and fight or flight takes over.

At this point, even if we use our human words or emotions of love to reassure the person that we can be trusted and that the hurtful events of their past aren’t about to play out again- the triggered person is no longer open to this info. They are in protective mode.

The only thing they want to do at this point is run upstairs to avoid the vacuum, and in the heightened state they are in, they may also give us a piece of their mind on their way up there.

As humans, we have the power to dispel triggers and projections by doing the inner work necessary to help us separate one situation from another. We can discover through careful examination that though the details of the situation may seem strikingly similar to those in the situations where we were hurt previously, we need to take a deeper look into the intentions or emotional state of the person or thing that originally caused us harm. This is where we will find our answers.

We need to ask ourselves˗ are the motivations, true intentions, and overall emotional state of the current person the same as the person who harmed us in the past? It may take some digging and raw honesty, especially if we are still in the triggered state, to find the real answer. If we have done the work and know for certain that the answer is yes after fully processing and separating the initial incidents from this one˗ we may need to do something different or have every reason to want to protect ourselves.

But what happens if when we look as deep as we can go, we realize that the intentions of the current person and situation are not to harm us, and that in fact they won’t harm us (based on our previous history of interactions with that person), but rather that we are blocking intimacy with them because of the giant fearball we have placed between ourselves and any trust we have of them.

We got our cat as a stray. She was friendly but skittish, and we were certain that she had been someone’s indoor pet but had been traumatized in some way before she was probably thrown out or just let go. Because of this, she was distrustful of humans, through at the same time she craved our affection and love. Maybe a vacuum had hurt her in the past, and maybe the person operating it had intended to harm her (most likely as a result of their own inner demons that they couldn’t calm).

If she wants to fully let down her guard and enjoy her life with us, she will need to learn that we do not intend to harm her, and that we will not use an object (especially the one she has been conditioned to be afraid of) to harm her.

She must learn to separate the motives and intentions of the person in the past from the actions, motives, and intentions she has come to expect from us for the last few years in her present.
My question in all of this is here:

Is there somewhere in your life where you are so traumatized by the feelings and objects that were directed your way in a negative energy in the past, that you are not able to trust those who are not trying to hurt you in the present˗ though the details of the situation or object may seem the same?

Maybe it’s time to take a deeper look.

Struggling? It’s a normal part of the process-don’t judge yourself.

Struggling?  It’s a normal part of the process-don’t judge yourself.

Struggle is a completely normal part of life.

Though it is uncomfortable, and there are indeed stresses associated with it, I encourage you to hold yourself gently during this time and resist the urge to judge yourself.  You are trying to break through to the next level, and the path isn’t always linear, but you are showing up and doing what you can, whether or not you fall down.

When the internal chatter starts to show up, and you feel ashamed for whatever you are going through, try to remember that you need your own love most of all, and that there is NO SHAME in being where you are.

Remind and congratulate yourself for all the things that you have done well, and do what you can to find the answers you need.  Meditate (though it’s best to do this daily), journal (extra if you need to), reach out for help, and have a conversation with whatever you believe in that is bigger than you.

Just don’t judge yourself harshly for where you are.

Writing this for myself as much as I am for you.